Understanding Mike Bennett’s Decision to Ask for His Release From WWE

When we grow up, we all have dreams of being who we want to be. Growing up, my dreams had took on several forms. At first, I wanted to be a firefighter, then an archaeologist, then a teacher, and then I decided that I wanted to be a writer. As we reach adulthood, very few of us actually reach our goals. We begin to live the lie that our dreams are nothing more than dreams.

As Mickey Goldmill from the Rocky movies so eloquently puts it: we “become civilized!”

Fear kicks into overdrive when people from parents to other people outside our lives tell us that our dreams are ridiculous and to give them up before we suffer. We begin to put our dreams in the backbunner and we become realistic. Getting a “real job” or livng paycheck to paycheck becomes our dream while our creativity suffers for it.

One person who I feel is brave enough to express his angst with that sentiment of security over a dream is a pro-wrestler and WWE Superstar name Mike Bennett, also known as Mike Kanellis.

Today, Bennett did something brave and unprecedented of a WWE Superstar. He announced on social media that he asked for his release from WWE. From what I read from the post, Bennett did not say anything bad about the company. He only expressed frustration with not working “one day a week” which was “not going o cut it” for him. He noted that he only resigned with the WWE  because he though it was “best for my family, and maybe from a finanical standpoint it was.”

The one part of the post that caught me attention was when he mentioned the lack of work affecting his home life and family. Furthermore, he added that after battling drug addiction for four years, he had came to the epiphany that he wanted to work more wrestling matches and travel the world like he did when he was on the independent scene. Another part of the post that really hit me was the mention of wanting to be an example to his daughter of what it is like to earn a living doing what he loves rather than “collecting a pay check.”

What I read from this post is a man who wanted to do nothing more than become a pro-wrestler and entertain crowds.

And Mike Bennett, if you are reading this. I understand where you are coming from.

I too have been in too many situations where I have had to put my dreams on the back bunner due to financial security. Now don’t get me wrong, it is always good to earn gauranteed money but if you are not living your dream and you are working in a job that you don’t like or at the very least doens’t allow you to live your dream, then there’s something wrong. I’m currently in a job that allows me to leave early so that I could work on creative projects like this blog and go to evening writing or comic book events. I am very grateful for that job. However, in my previous job whch was at a civil service organization that must not be named (out of respect), it was the opposite. Like Mike, I was there just earning a paycheck and not happy but unlike Mike, I was not brave enough to get real with myself and tell my supervisor that I want to call it quits. Actually, the civil service job fired me and even though I was upset, deep down, I was free and my creativity was returning slowly but gradually.

Working in a job or place that does not align with your goals or mission can sap your creativity. It can also make you angry to the point where you may need to seek counseling.  I have Asperger’s Syndrome coupled with Anxiety. Every month, I make it an effort to see a counsellor while my family and my co-workers encourage me to embrace my Aspergers everyday. I still deal with some of the struggles but I know with dealing with it and having a great support system, I can learn to cope with it in a healthy way.

However, what is not okay is living paycheck to paycheck to the point where your mental and physical health is at risk. That’s how some otherwise healthy people end up getting cancer or some other sickness. This is because some people live in fear that they would end up in a bad place if they decided to attempt to live their dream. But there are some who look in the mirror and decide to seek help before its too late.

And Mike Bennett is doing a great job dealing with his struggles. As he mentioned in his post, he bravely fought drug addiction for four years and won. He won the battle not only for his wife, Maria Kanellis, his children, and his career, he won for him. This is a man who loves himself. Why else would he bravely ask for his release from one of the biggest wrestling companies in the world? Maybe he feels more comfortable working in the independent scene where he would have more opportunities and respect. If I had a promotion of my own, Bennett would be one of my top guys and his wife would be included.

I enjoyed his character the “Miracle” Mike Bennett in Impact Wrestling. The character was a scoundrel/swindler type with a suave personality that exuded confidence. Not to mention that thee character had the coolest taste in clothing: sneakers, a two-piece suit, with a fedora plus a gorgeous looking red head at his side…captial “A” awesome!  If Mike Bennett could pull it off, why couldn’t I? Maybe a certain girl I have a crush on might take notice…

But in all seriousness, I have a new respect for Mike Bennett for showing me what it is like for a man to love himself. I have been struggling with loving myself all these years until I decided to seek help and follow my goals at the behest of family and co-workers. Mike, if you are reading this, you have a fan and whereever you will go, I will follow your carreer because you have become one of the people to inspire me to love myself more and embrace my Aspergers.

I know wherever it is you go, you will be successful. Whether its here in the US, Europe, Japan, Sibera, Earth-2, the Moon, you’re going to be awesome.

I don’t know about anyone esle but, I can only speak for myself. Mike and Maria Bennett, I am right behind you peeps and I understand your reason to request your release from WWE.

Go on and live your dream and remember…never stop believing and fight and work for a better tomorrow!

Brian from Earth-16

Mike and Maria
Mike Bennet  and his wfe  Maria Kanellis. Credit: WWE

Lio Rush: Is He a Hero or a Villain?

In addition to following the world of comics and popular culture, I also follow the world of professional wrestling. I watch a lot of WWE, some of Impact Wrestling and some of the Indies. I am looking forward to seeing All Elite Wrestling. Overall, I enjoy pro-wrestling and have done so ever since I was 11-years old.

And since I am a wrestling fan, there is one story that has caught my interest and one that I felt I needed to write about. The story involves a wrestler name Lio Rush, who was viewed by many in the wrestling community to be a prodigy and a WWE hopeful with a promising future. At 22-years old, Rush was signed to a full-time WWE contract on July 2017.

However, as Rush transitioned into the WWE, his troubles began. Around October 2017, tweeted a joke on his Twitter account about Tennile Dashwood (formerly known as Emma) getting fired from the WWE because she was not ready for Asuka. The tweet ended with a clown emoji which got several WWE wrestlers incensed. Many wrestlers called Rush out on social media for his conduct and the newcomer quickly apologize but the damage had been done. Lio Rush had a black spot in his WWE career that would follow him up to this day.

Despite being called up to the 205 Live roster and becoming the mouthpiece to the quiet and Bobby Lashley, Rush’s troubles did not end after that infamous tweet he posted.

Rush was reported to have rubbed people in a narcissistic manner. Several reports viewed Rush in an arrogant light by saying that he and his wife were going to have a reality show about their lives on the road and that he was this huge megastar. Other reports had shown Rush being argumentative with wrestlers like Finn Balor who reportedly tried to advised him on the ramifications of bringing loved ones to WWE meetings. One report even went into detail how he disrespected WWE veterans by not doing the tasks asked of him as a junior member of the roster; such tasks range from offering veterans water after a match or helping to set up the WWE rings. As a result, Rush was apparently blacklisted from appearing on Raw this past Monday or future shows going forward. Not so surprising, the segment between The Miz and Bobby Lashley had no mention of Lio Rush.

One thing is clear from all this, Rush’s career with the WWE  seems to be in serious jeopardy.

But is it really? It depends on who you really ask. After all, the only people who could answer that question is the WWE brass and Lio Rush himself. The real question here since it involves Lio Rush, both the man and wrestler, is is he a hero or a villain?

Here’s my answer that only as a fan I can give: in some respects, he is a hero…in other respects, he is a villain.

First off, here’s why I say that Lio Rush is a hero.

The intrepid Lio Rush has been seen in various independent promotions showcasing his repertoire of wrestling skills and breathtaking stunts. To me, the young star is the epitome of the American Dream having to come from very little only to work hard and make a name for himself in something that some portray as choreographed fighting. As Rush showcased his amazing talent in Maryland Championship Wrestling, Combat Zone Wrestling and Ring of Honor, the WWE began to take notice and eventually hired the young talent. In my view, Lio Rush stuck to his goal of wanting to be a WWE superstar and made it. In the WWE, he had stellar matches against his real life buddy, Patrick Clark better known as the flamboyant Velveteen Dream. Things were looking promising until the Emma-Asuka tweet came out and that was when I began to see a more cocky and sinister side to Rush which brings me to my second argument of why I view him as a villain.

Knowing that the WWE has rules and procedures on how to go about things, Rush should have known better than to break those rules. As stringent as they are, there is a reason behind those rules. WWE is a publicly owned company known world wide. They have a brand. If anyone were to get out of line, it would be a mark on the WWE. And if the reports of Rush’s behavior are true, it would mean big trouble for not only Rush but Vince McMahon’s empire. Let’s play devil’s advocate and let’s say that Lio Rush does become a big megastar that he had foreseen. Rush is maybe a four time WWE Champion or Universal Champion. One day, the news breaks of him doing something that could damage not only his reputation but ruin the WWE’s image which is now considered a family friendly product.

How would that look to a billion dollar company? Just ask Bill DeMont, formerly Hugh Morris, who was once a former wrestler and trainer in the WWE Performance Center. News of his bullying his trainees got so viral that he had to resign in fear of casting WWE in a bad light. Or what about Eric Arndt better known as Enzo Amore? Amore, known for being a menace backstage was eventually fired for allegedly sexually assaulting a young woman battling mental health issues. Or how about Hulk Hogan? The legendary wrestler was recorded muttering the N-word to the point where the WWE had no choice but to fire him. A year ago, Hogan has been reinstated back into the WWE Hall of Fame and appeared on some WWE shows with strong applause.

With these examples, it is no wonder that WWE is always so quick to put out a small fire before it gets big. Rush’s behavior, regardless of his position in the company, is a liability and this is what would make him a villain in the eyes of his fellow wrestlers, the WWE brass, and the WWE Universe.

In conclusion, I am no fan of Lio Rush but I don’t want him to fail either. If what is being said in the news wires is true, then Rush has two choices he can make. In my opinion, he should quit the WWE and go back to the Indies where he probably would feel more comfortable and less restricted. Or he can get his act together and learn to follow the WWE’s rules and policies. Mike “The Miz” Mizanin was in a similar predicament and he decided to get his act together. Today, he is one of the WWE’s biggest stars and more respected in the locker room than he was when he started out.

As for the fans, I would not be so quick to say awful things about someone we do not know personally. For all we know, Lio Rush could have went through something in his childhood or some period in his life to act the way he does. I understand that there is no excuse for bad behavior but, their should also be some understanding. I feel that if someone were to understand Rush, that person could get him the help that he needs. Maybe that person was Finn Balor or maybe it might be someone outside the wrestling business.

Finn-Balor-Lio-Rush
Lio Rush taking on Finn Balor. Credit: WWE

Either way, to see someone fail in what they love or have a passion for is heart breaking. I’ve been there and it is not a good feeling.  This essay is not aimed at knocking down Rush but it is just a fan’s understanding of how conducting yourself a certain way can predicate certain reactions from peers. In short, Rush is not an evil person. He may need to meditate on what is working for him and what he can improve on. I think we as the WWE Universe of pro-wrestling fans owe him that.

What are your thoughts? Please comment on what you think about the whole situation and remember constant readers, stay ever so awesome.

Life Is Like the Kessel Run

solo-chewbacca-lando-beckett-qira-han-falcon-cockpit
Photo Credit: Disney & Lucasfilm Ltd.

As I sit down and write this, I began looking back at the good times and the bad times in my almost 32-years of existence. I have come to realize that I am not perfect nor invincible. I am neither almighty or immortal. I’m an proud idiot who loves comic books and science fiction, and pro-wrestling. I enjoy writing, blogging or podcasting about those genres. And you know what? I’m damn proud of it. You read that right. And it if wasn’t for my admiration for those things, I don’t think I would piece together how the the world works.

When it comes to my life and all of what I just mentioned above, I think of the Kessel Run. I write this because when I saw Solo: A Star Wars Story, I was once again that 10-year old boy who wanted to be Han Solo. I didn’t want to be Luke Skywalker. I wanted to be Han Solo. I wanted to have the Millennium Falcon as my own ship. I wanted Princess Leia to be my girlfriend. I wanted to be a general of the Rebel Alliance. Hell, I wanted to be frozen in carbonite. I wanted to tell people at the right damn moment to ‘never to me the odds.’ Say what you want but, that movie brought those desires back.

When I saw that scene of Han flying the Falcon right into the an uncharted path in the Kessel Run with TIE Fighters chasing him. There was debris that could have gotten Han and his friends killed. Or even worse. The Falcon could have been blown up in a giant ball of Coaxium. But with faith in himself and his pilot abilities, Solo beat the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs. It wasn’t like the Corellian woke up one morning with a huge smile on his face and walked up to Chewbacca and said: “Ya know Chewie, I’m going to beat the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs.” No, this was just the icing on the cake. Han wanted he and his friends to survive and live.

The point I’m making is that in my life, I have had to go in sometimes through an uncharted path even if I had a guide (Han had Lando’s droid L3 , albeit, she hated his guts). My Kessel Run like the one in Solo has been full of debris. One of them finding out about my diagnosis of Aspergers at age 17 and Von Hippel Lindau Syndrome nine years later at age 25. Such debris had bruise and battered me just like the debris in the Kessel Run nearly wrecked the Falcon. And yes, such debris probably would have killed me.

But even though I was terrified, I got through it. I knew Han was terrified despite knowing he was an amazing and phenomenal pilot. He didn’t want to die but he knew that he didn’t get out, the Imperial were going to blow him and his friends sky high.

I feel that we all have to run our own Kessel Run. I do it everyday when I go to work. The debris could come in the form of a customer yelling at me or a write up from a supervisor. I go through the Kessel Run when it comes doing my podcasts. The debris could come from a trolling listener who always has something to say. I go through the Kessel Run when I am dealing with VHL. A debris could come in the form of a surgery (granted my surgeon at Mayo Clinic sometimes reminds me of Wedge Antilles). I go through the Kessel Run when freelance writing. The debris could be in the form of a reader pointing out that I misquoted someone or said an unsubstantiated fact. The Kessel Run is everyday. It is in all of us.

Now as I write this, I think of WWE Superstar Joe “Roman Reigns” Anoa’i. He definitely had to fly through his Kessel Run and a debris came in the form of Leukemia. When I heard the news that his Leukemia had returned…I felt shocked and sadness. How could this bigger than life wrestler go through such a thing? Well…I don’t know the answer to that question. All I do know is that he is human. And this guy has been through so much debris in his Kessel Run. The fans booed him out of the building despite him being the good guy and going out to the WWE ring with a smile on his face. And he prevailed. But he is not finished with his run yet.

I even think of Alden Ehrenreich when many of the fans trashed him for being in Solo. He had to go through his Kessel Run when he ran into debris in the form of the many fans giving him flak and the rumors said that he needed an acting coach. For what it was worth, he did a damn good job as Han Solo and was his very own Han Solo. Even Harrison Ford said that he should be his own Han Solo. And he did it with a smile on his face and Solo actually was liked by some fans. It was a true Star Wars movie and most certainly better than The Last Jedi.

I could name a couple more examples of many people (real and fictional) who went/are going through the Kessel Runs of their lives: My grandparents, my parents, my siblings, my aunts and uncles, my cousins, my nephews, Jesus Christ, Martin Luther King Jr., Rosa Parks, AJ Styles, Becky Lynch, Rick Grimes, George Washington, Dave Ramsey, Rachel Cruz, Daryl Dixon, Maggie Rhee, Glenn Rhee, Michonne, Joseph Pulitzer, Chris Jericho, Harriet Tubman, John F. Kennedy, Jackie Robinson, Clark “Superman” Kent, Steve “Captain America” Rogers, Bruce “Batman” Wayne, Barbara “Batgirl” Gordon, Barry “The Flash” Allen, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson…I can name many. We all are going through a Kessel Run. Rich or poor. Man or woman. Republican or Democrat. Black, white, yellow, brown, green, red, blue. The Kessel Run does not discriminate. You will go through it just like Han did, I promise you but, it will be fun and worth it as long as you have faith in yourself. And it would be scary but it would be fun.

In conclusion…I just wanted to thank Han Solo (Harrison Ford and Alden Ehrenreich) for helping me make sense of my life. If it wasn’t for Han Solo, I feel like I wouldn’t get some part of my life. In some sense…I feel like Han Solo an influence on my life much like Zorro was to Batman.

Superman made me believe that a man could fly. Batman made me believe that a man could fight through tragedy. Han Solo made me believe that a man can overcome the odds as long as he told the doubters to: “Never tell me the odds!”

My final message to you people: never let anyone tell you the odds, no matter the debris in your life called the Kessel Run.

 

 

 

 

My Review of Batman: White Knight

After reading Sean Gordon Murphy’s Batman: White Knight, I realized that the line between “good” and “evil” or “hero” and “villain” could often be blurred. The graphic novel, written under DC Comics Black Label, showed a different take on the dynamic between Batman and the Joker that we have never seen before. After being beaten almost to death, the Joker pleads to Batman that he could change. Dark Knight shoves down a couple pills, meant to medicate insanity, down the the throat of the Clown Prince of Crime. When the Joker is taken to custody, he starts to become more sane and starts referring himself to his given name: Jack Napier.

Many of Gotham City’s citizens are skeptical of the newly redeemed Jack Napier but he cleverly gets out of prison but this time, he does not escape like he usually did as the Joker. Jack Napier appeals to the people that his joker persona was a lie.

The redeemed Joker vows to start a new life in order to restore Gotham City to a safe city without corruption and without the Batman. Obviously, Batman does not believe Napier and keeps an eye on him while the former villain uses Backport, a community of minorities, low income earners, and high levels of crime to gain support in his crusade to become councilman. And he has none other than Harley Quinn at his side, as always, to do his bidding. It seems that Gordon Murphy wrote Backport to represent the current divide going on in the United States of America; the division between two political party’s, the division between the patriarchy and feminism, the division between all races, the division between rich and poor, and so forth.

As Napier becomes popular, Batman and the Gotham City Police Department become less popular due to Napier continuing to expose the corruption and the apparent hypocrisy of Gotham’s elite. This leads even Nightwing, Batgirl, Commissioner Gordon, and many others to slowly distance themselves from the Batman and question his methods. The story ends with a really poignant twist that I don’t want to spoil but it is a twist that I felt would make people understand why Jack Napier was actually the hero Gotham needed while Batman was the hero that Gotham deserves, in reference to Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight.

Another Nolan reference that came to mind while reading this novel was the quote that Harvey Dent (Two-Face) said: “You either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.”

I feel that Muphy Gordon’s writing used that quote as the theme of White Knight. Murphy’s Batman, started out as a myth and then an ally to the GCPD, eventually became to be viewed as a villain when the Joker, under his Napier persona, exposed the danger Batman presented to the people of Gotham by only protecting Gotham’s wealthy elite and enacting his war on crime in the low class areas like Backport. In addition, Batman’s seemingly unwillingness to share his technology with the Gotham Police was also brought to question by Napier.

Overall, I enjoyed this comic and it wasn’t just because I am a Batman fan. Gordon Murphy’s writing really showed me how Batman and Joker are almost one in the same. As a result, Murphy Gordon has become one of my Batman writers next to Grant Morrison and Frank Miller.

Murphy used his writing to show how Batman and Joker are like two sides of the same coin or a yin and yang. Harley Quinn pointed out that the Jack was so much like Batman and that they actually both wanted the same thing: to protect Gotham and make it safe. I also loved the art done by Murphy and the coloring by Matt Hollingsworth.

Not to digress, but I felt that other mediums have used the same brilliant dynamic that Murphy used between his Batman and Joker to tell their stories. In WWE, Becky Lynch seemingly a “villain” had the fans turn on Charlotte Flair who was a “hero” by reminding them that the latter had everything handed down to her because she was the daughter of Ric Flair. As a result, just like the people of Backport rallying behind Napier and turning on Batman, the WWE Universe rallied behind Lynch and turned on Charlotte Flair. In a sense, it can be argued that Becky Lynch and Charlotte, like Batman and Joker, are two sides of the same coin; both are competitive want the same prize: the WWE Women’s Championship. Could Becky Lynch aka the Irish Lasskicker, and now the self proclaimed “Man” be WWE’s Jack Napier or White Knight? Perhaps, Jack Napier and Harley Quinn would agree and maybe that is what the higher ups at the WWE are cleverly leveraging.

I read an article where Sean Gordon Murphy plans on writing a sequel to the White Knight that centers around how Napier became the Joker and what actually happened to Jason Todd in that reality. The book is set to come out in Sept. 2019 and I am looking forward to reading it. Overall, Batman: White Knight has become one of my favorite Batman stories since Batman: Year One, Batman: Dark Victory, and Batman and Son and it is a must read even if you are not a Batman fan.

 

The Story of How I Chose to Become A Writer

When I was little, I always enjoyed writing. I can remember creating a newspaper that centered around the crayfishes in my fourth-grade classroom. Obviously, there was only one paper in syndication because only I wrote it and only I read it. A couple years later, my love for essay writing is developed well into the closing days of my eighth grade year in middle school. However, this craze was later suppressed due my focus on pursuing the sciences in high school and aspiring (not really because I only wanted to to do it for the money) to work in the medical field. This suppression would only last for almost my entire high school career until I became fixated on improving on my writing in my 12th-grade AP British literature class. It was there that my love of writing underwent a resurgence. My love of writing even became more obvious when I took an college English course at University and wrote several essays including one related to Kafka’s work the Metamorphosis (A book I highly recommend to anyone). And it was the year after that I decided to pursue writing.

Now many people have supported me on my mission to become a writer while I have also had my share of detractors or doubters. But I guess that is the beauty of pursuing your dreams isn’t it?

In his book, “No Is a Four Letter Word,” pro-wrestler Chris Jericho narrates that as a kid growing up in Winnipeg, Manitoba Canada, he wanted to be a pro-wrestler and a rock star. Like anyone else pursuing a goal, he had his supporters and he had his detractors. And for this detractors, he had this brilliant quote that I am now trying to live by:

“You see, I NEVER thought I was too small or not talented enough to do what I wanted to do, and I didn’t appreciate anybody who felt differently. The way I saw it, you were either with me or against me in my quest for fire, and if you were against me, well, you were a muttonhead and I really didn’t have any use for you anyway.”

-Chris Jericho

Jericho mentions that many people doubted that he would be successful as a pro-wrestler due to his short height and average stature. However, about two decades later, the man becomes the first ever undisputed WWE World Heavyweight champion and from there on, has a stellar career in pro-wrestling. In addition, he also cultivated a stellar career as a rock n’ roll musician. How many people could say that? Apparently, Chris Jericho can and it was because he believed in himself. The dude followed his goals.

I feel that is where I am at in the beginning of the third decade in my life. My twenties were a decade of exploring the different avenues I could go into but would very likely have some to no success. Although deep down, I knew that I wanted to be a writer, I have tried my hand at several careers at the urging of others.

Medical field? As I have mentioned before, I have heard that the money was good but, due to my somewhat lack of patience…the poor patient would have a sense of bad bedside manner and report me to the medical board. Goodbye medical license; it was nice knowing ya. School teacher? Going back to the lack of patience…the kids in my class would be so thrilled to have a substitute teacher. I like kids but…not in the classroom.  Accountancy? Well…I’m okay with crunching some numbers but who wants to be counting money all day? Besides, I did have a civil service finance job that only lasted a year when I thought it could have lasted me more than two. Yeaaaaaah. Let’s just leave it at that, shall we? Computer program? Boring. Though coding seems to be integrating in most fields. So, I guess it could be useful. But as a career? I couldn’t handle spending hours on end staring at a computer screen doing nothing but endlessly putting in code after code. ‘(No shade on computer programmers of course.)

I want to go into writing because I feel that it is what I can do. It is a gift. It is a hobby. It is a way of escape. It is my superpower.

After going through several careers (or learning about them) during my twenties, I ultimately decided to settle on being a writer. If I did not have a desire for those things  have mentioned then, there was no way I was going to have a desire for those things now.

Now, if you were to ask me the billion dollar question , “why become a writer?” I would tell you: “that’s a good question…”

Well along with the things I have mentioned in the first paragraph, I was inspired to become a writer after watching the Christopher Reeve Superman movies as a kid. Sure I wanted to be Superman but, I also wanted to be Clark Kent. As a kid, I desired a pair of glasses and wore some toy red rimmed glasses emulating the mild mannered reporter. I pictured having my name on a byline and in the second year at college, it eventually it happened at my college newspaper. It was a huge accomplishment. However, I had hit some rough patches during the year 2008 which I would prefer not to mention. All I can say is that it affected my aspirations as a writer and that was when more detractors came. As I heard their voices, the seeds of doubt grew into my nogin and that was when I began to go aimlessly from career to career after college graduation. It wasn’t until post civil service finance job that I really did want to pursue writing. Why else was I not thriving in those other careers?

I need to believe in myself that I can pursue this ancient yet awesome and adventurous field. I may not be in the ranks of Hunter S. Thompson, Mark Twain, Erest Hemingway, Maya Angelou, James Baldwin or F. Scott Fitzgerald, but I know that if I at least dream about my goals as a writer and pursuing them, I know that I will succeed. And I know that I can go to sleep knowing that I made the decision to pursue my dream as a writer.